7 out of 10 women blame menopause for their divorce.
New research released to align with World Menopause Day, confirms what has been long assumed, but never proven, that the menopause has a clear and negative impact on relationships, separation and divorce.
A survey carried out by The Family Law Menopause Project and Newson Health Research, shows that 7 in 10 women (73%) who responded to the research blame the menopause for the breakdown of their marriage.
13 million women of menopausal age in the UK alone and 9.5 million marriages and relationships are under threat.
An additional 67% of the 1,000 women taking part in the survey alarmingly claimed it increased domestic abuse and arguments.
Only a fifth of those women had sought support to talk about the perimenopause/menopause because they didn’t realise, at the time, that it was a contributing element to the breakdown of the relationship.
With an estimated 13 million women of menopausal age in this country, and one in four of them having significant symptoms, these figures portray a shocking reality, as 9.5million marriages and relationships in the UK are undoubtedly under threat because of a women’s hormone deficiency, and the correlation between the two not being fully understood or acknowledged.
The study also highlighted that despite almost 80% of respondents sharing that their experience of perimenopause/menopause symptoms had put a strain on their children and/or family life, only a third of all women had been offered treatment or Hormone Replacement Therapy to relieve their symptoms despite it being the optimum treatment. These findings support recent reports of the lack of specialised menopause care available to women within the National Health Service.
On the flip-side, 65% of those who were offered Hormone Replacement Therapy said it has made a positive impact on their menopause-related symptoms. Furthermore, 70% of those who had not received support or treatment had said that if they had, it could have had a positive impact on their relationship and potentially avoided the breakdown of their marriage.
With the onset of perimenopause occurring in the mid-40s, and the average age of menopause at 51 and the peak time of divorce being between the ages of 45 and 55, these results highlight the critical need for awareness and the importance of opening the conversation, offering advice, and encouraging women to seek help and support.
The study also magnifies enormous gaps in the awareness and understanding of those within the legal industry who are supporting couples going through relationship difficulties and the separation and divorce process.
The majority (86%) of respondents reported that they did not feel comfortable raising the issue of perimenopause/menopause with their solicitor and nearly all (97%) stated that they did not raise it with them nor did they explore how menopause may affect the situation when it comes to relationship dynamics such as splitting the assets and/or children arrangements matters and co-parenting into the future.
Nearly 8 in 10 (76%) thought that solicitors and judges would benefit from training in respect of menopause symptoms, so they know how to sensitively deal with it and factor it into their cases.
Menopause and divorce appear to be linked but the question is, why does this happen? What is it about menopause that causes issues in a relationship?
The physical and emotional symptoms of menopause, such as mood swings, sleep disturbances, and changes in libido, can lead to misunderstandings, decreased intimacy, and increased arguments between partners.
For women, it can be hard to understand and accept the changes that are happening and even harder to explain these to a partner. As such, many couples start to drift apart and although menopause itself will not cause the breakdown of a relationship or marriage, it does create an atmosphere of imbalance, conflict, isolation and stress.
Menopause is one of many big life changes alongside pregnancy, bereavement, career development or even empty-nest syndrome. These changes causes a time of reflection and almost create a crossroads in life, taking stock of what matters most. They also tend to expose and magnify any existing cracks in the marriage and therefore, in respect of menopause, it act as a catalyst. If the relationship was already struggling, it may not have the resilience to survive such challenging times – and the prospect of a divorce becomes much more likely.
Whilst the physical symptoms of the menopause are well-known and often discussed, the mental health impact is often ignored and can be catastrophic for many women, having a deeply negative effect on their work, relationships, and finances as a result.
